It's been a long time since I posted something on this blog. I'm glad to be back on Blogger again :D
I was too busy studying and working in my college. I only had a little spare time. I used most of them for playing my piano. Let me tell you what I studied during my first semester. Conventionally, I took 11 credits, which can be divided into 5 subjects. Those subjects are: Mechatronics, Nonlinear Control Systems, Optimal Control, Advanced Robotics, and Specific Topic on Control Systems. In Mechatronics, we (I and my classmates) studied sensors, transducers, actuators, and sort of things related to mechanics and electronics engineering. In Nonlinear Control, we studied the describing function, phase plane, sliding mode control, and Lyapunov stability. We studied the optimal design of regulator and estimator which respectively called LQR and LQE (or Kalman Filter) in Optimal Control. We only studied a few new technique for robot application in Advanced Robotics. I don't remember what I studied because it was too difficult to me to understand. In the last subject, the lecturer gave us an introduction about model predictive control and anti windup schemes.
The previous week was the last week I had tasks to submit. At last, this semester is over. I have some time to breathe. I just learned some new songs, but still not perfect when I play those. I'll post the video immediately after I've mastered all of it one by one. The songs are: Final Fantasy Battle Medley which mostly arranged by Michael Gluck, The Dancer by Levi Gunardi, Intermezzo from the Concert Etude by Nikolai Kapustin, and Secret from the movie "Secret" by Jay Chou.
I intended to learn something about control systems and do some projects during this vacation since I couldn't have any class in this short semester because I had no interest to take one or both the two subjects offered. I want to review and re-study what I've learned and forgotten. For the project, I get an offer to make a new module for control system laboratory due to a new different motor that will be used. I also need to make a precisely regulated power supply, because somehow I need it on occasion.
I'd like to study english for TOEFL as well.
You may wonder why, but do you see? I don't do vacation. Even if sometimes I get bored studying all the time, I feel that I must not get bored before I've mastered what I studied. In addition, I'm still single. And, you know, I prefer to staying in my room or in laboratory rather that going outside alone.
By the way, the date format will be the title when I write my diary in this blog. Thus, this is my first diary I write on my blog. For me, it's a little awkward when a man writes a diary because in my head, I assume that most of diaries are written by women rather than by men. Maybe just because I don't know the real statistics or facts but, whatever. I'll keep writing my diary.
Sunday, 2 June 2013
Friday, 4 January 2013
...
I don't know. I'm confused, after everything happened between us...
I think I saw the light again. I thought we can be together again. I was glad when you showed up and asked for my cares. I was happy about the fact that you were okay, even if I also knew the sad part, the one that made me jealous.
I don't want to distract you. I want you to focus to be what you wanna be. I want you to reach your success.
I want you to get the best, in every way...
however, it turns out that my cares are just inhibiting you. Oh, sorry I didn't see that. Sorry...
but have you ever thought and considered my feelings?
all I want is you. To be with you.
as simple as that...
please, hold my hand and I'll do everything to keep it so.
I don't care with everything around us.
I want to live, as long as I can hold your hand.
I want to die, if you let me go and never come back.
Love is painful. My love story has turned into a tragedy.
Oh, please! I don't want to fall in love anymore.
I wish I were born with no heart, so I can never feel the pain of love.
I'll go away from you...
I won't disturb you with my cares anymore...
because I want you to happy, to get everything you want...
I offered you my life, my soul, and my afterlife's life...
but unfortunately, you didn't accept my offer, you chose us to live separately...
okay then. Well, it seems that I can't fight for our love by myself...
Once I said, if you let me go for once more time, then you should kill me...
yes, I understand. You're killing me now...
I think I saw the light again. I thought we can be together again. I was glad when you showed up and asked for my cares. I was happy about the fact that you were okay, even if I also knew the sad part, the one that made me jealous.
I don't want to distract you. I want you to focus to be what you wanna be. I want you to reach your success.
I want you to get the best, in every way...
however, it turns out that my cares are just inhibiting you. Oh, sorry I didn't see that. Sorry...
but have you ever thought and considered my feelings?
all I want is you. To be with you.
as simple as that...
please, hold my hand and I'll do everything to keep it so.
I don't care with everything around us.
I want to live, as long as I can hold your hand.
I want to die, if you let me go and never come back.
Love is painful. My love story has turned into a tragedy.
Oh, please! I don't want to fall in love anymore.
I wish I were born with no heart, so I can never feel the pain of love.
I'll go away from you...
I won't disturb you with my cares anymore...
because I want you to happy, to get everything you want...
I offered you my life, my soul, and my afterlife's life...
but unfortunately, you didn't accept my offer, you chose us to live separately...
okay then. Well, it seems that I can't fight for our love by myself...
Once I said, if you let me go for once more time, then you should kill me...
yes, I understand. You're killing me now...
Wednesday, 2 January 2013
Somewhere
I wish we were still together, and trust each other. I hug you and wipe your tears coming from your beautiful eyes. I'll say it's okay, everything will be fine. Just trust me that I love you, and I promise we'll be happy forever. Then, I whisper...
there's a place for us
somewhere
a place for us
peace and quiet and open air
wait for us
somewhere
there's a time for us
someday
a time for us
time together with time to spare
time to look
time to care
someday
somewhere
we'll find a new way of living
we'll find a way of forgiving
somewhere
there's a place for us
a time and place for us
hold my hand, and we're halfway there
hold my hand and I'll take you there
somehow
someday
somewhere
("Somewhere", taken form act 2 of West Side Story, music by Leonard Bernstein, lyrics by Stephen Sondheim)
there's a place for us
somewhere
a place for us
peace and quiet and open air
wait for us
somewhere
there's a time for us
someday
a time for us
time together with time to spare
time to look
time to care
someday
somewhere
we'll find a new way of living
we'll find a way of forgiving
somewhere
there's a place for us
a time and place for us
hold my hand, and we're halfway there
hold my hand and I'll take you there
somehow
someday
somewhere
("Somewhere", taken form act 2 of West Side Story, music by Leonard Bernstein, lyrics by Stephen Sondheim)
Tuesday, 1 January 2013
Remembrance
Today is the first day of the first month of 2013. I'm exhausted after about 10 hours journey form Yogyakarta to Bandung by night train. The train departed on time, but arrived late. I slept enough on the train but not well, since a family brought a baby, and the baby cried very often. It was really bothering me, and someone called me around midnight but I did not answer it, because I was sleeping. I came at my room in a boarding house in the morning, about 6.30. The room was really messy. It took me about 4 hours to clean it up.
The day before today, I still in my hometown. I didn't know how it came into my head, when suddenly I started to search piano songs which I've heard for the first time. The piano songs played by Richard Clayderman. The story begins when my mom was in a bookstore, when she was in the store, looking for books, she heard a beautiful piano ballad song. Being curious, she came to the operator and asked them about the song. She was being informed that the song title was 'A Comme Amour', played by Richard Clayderman. Later, she bought a cassette contained those song.
After she came home, my mother played those on tape player. Me, being a fifth or sixth grade of an elementary school student, found the songs were beautiful. Before I knew the song, I didn't know anyting about piano, I didn't care about music. But, after I heard that, I became very interested in piano. I started to collect money, and used it to buy more cassettes. My father had a keyboard, and I started to play what I heard on the keyboard. I didn't know any music theory, except the one from my grandma. My grandma once taught me some child's songs on her electric organ when she was still alive, and I was just a first grader in elementary school.
Entering primary school, I started to learn piano on my father keyboard. I enjoyed Richard Clayderman's songs so much. Some of them were 'Ballade pour Adeline', 'A Comme Amour', 'Les Derniers Jours D'anastasia Kemsky', 'Love Story', 'Maria-Tonight-America (from the opera West Side Story by Leonard Bernstein)', 'Time to Say Goodbye', 'Somewhere Over the Rainbow', and many more. At second grade, I started to get myself a piano lesson, from a local institution. I asked my parents to get me those piano lesson since they didn't let me to go to Bali Island on school holiday. I ever mastered several songs, like 'Ballade pour Adeline', 'A Comme Amour', and 'America'. For the 'America' song, I arranged it for piano solo by myself, because I didn't have the piano score, and I performed my 'America' in a musical class practice test when I was a first grader in high school.
Yesterday, I got some Richard Clayderman's songs from youtube. I also search the cassettes which I bought a long time ago, and I found some of them still functioning, even covered by dust. Listening to the songs evokes memories of the past. This event makes me to think. Had not my mother heard the song in the bookstore, maybe I've never studied piano, and maybe I've never been a piano player. Thanks mom, because you have introduced me beautiful piano songs in my early life.
The day before today, I still in my hometown. I didn't know how it came into my head, when suddenly I started to search piano songs which I've heard for the first time. The piano songs played by Richard Clayderman. The story begins when my mom was in a bookstore, when she was in the store, looking for books, she heard a beautiful piano ballad song. Being curious, she came to the operator and asked them about the song. She was being informed that the song title was 'A Comme Amour', played by Richard Clayderman. Later, she bought a cassette contained those song.
After she came home, my mother played those on tape player. Me, being a fifth or sixth grade of an elementary school student, found the songs were beautiful. Before I knew the song, I didn't know anyting about piano, I didn't care about music. But, after I heard that, I became very interested in piano. I started to collect money, and used it to buy more cassettes. My father had a keyboard, and I started to play what I heard on the keyboard. I didn't know any music theory, except the one from my grandma. My grandma once taught me some child's songs on her electric organ when she was still alive, and I was just a first grader in elementary school.
Entering primary school, I started to learn piano on my father keyboard. I enjoyed Richard Clayderman's songs so much. Some of them were 'Ballade pour Adeline', 'A Comme Amour', 'Les Derniers Jours D'anastasia Kemsky', 'Love Story', 'Maria-Tonight-America (from the opera West Side Story by Leonard Bernstein)', 'Time to Say Goodbye', 'Somewhere Over the Rainbow', and many more. At second grade, I started to get myself a piano lesson, from a local institution. I asked my parents to get me those piano lesson since they didn't let me to go to Bali Island on school holiday. I ever mastered several songs, like 'Ballade pour Adeline', 'A Comme Amour', and 'America'. For the 'America' song, I arranged it for piano solo by myself, because I didn't have the piano score, and I performed my 'America' in a musical class practice test when I was a first grader in high school.
Yesterday, I got some Richard Clayderman's songs from youtube. I also search the cassettes which I bought a long time ago, and I found some of them still functioning, even covered by dust. Listening to the songs evokes memories of the past. This event makes me to think. Had not my mother heard the song in the bookstore, maybe I've never studied piano, and maybe I've never been a piano player. Thanks mom, because you have introduced me beautiful piano songs in my early life.
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